I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
How external is "for external use only"?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
