i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
