Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
