At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
