bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
