Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
