No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
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