Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
