Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
