The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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