I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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