Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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