Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
