with your own penis?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
