You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
