i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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