her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
