why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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