Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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