i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
