had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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