I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
