I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
No more Irish car bombs ever.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I love you. Go after that dick
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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