OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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