so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
it's like iHOP with fire
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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