is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize