why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
