we're blogging at a bar
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
