I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
This can only be settled by a dance off.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
