Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Everclear isn't food dammit
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
