I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
