i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
