Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
