Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
You smell like stripper and shame
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
