It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
