i can't believe i had my finger in that
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize