Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
