i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
