yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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