I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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