Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
