Best friends brother. Beat that.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
