Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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