How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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