Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
