I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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