she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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