Non-Jews are for practice
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Randomize
