Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I checked into jail on foursquare
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I think my moral compass just broke
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
