I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
